As time goes by

As we have been told that we should writing dairy every day, we take this action into a useless and painfully routine, hard to say so, but it is hard to me.

I remember so many days, as time passed away, time leaves us nothing but lingering memories. We were happy, somedays life turns into blue. I fall in loved so many times, I had so many men, they goes stright into my body, and also into my heart, I used to searching for something, when the night come, the light turns off, the pale light. grass and flowers decorating the roadside, little by little, we just walk around hillside, there are three of us, it was the right time, we were so young, that really means something, and really means life, It looks like we are really living.

Then, you have find a man, who treat you really badly, I can offer nothing for help, because I am a gay, I also can not help myself sometimes, I also been treated badly and suffered so many pains in my early 20s, yes, young also means new and stupid sometimes, but even so, we do truely value it.

It just like, we are the noontime of the day, no matter what happend, we have only to forbear that.


Now and then

Life is meant to be lived, once we have been taught that we should never expect something unreal, our life has been turning into to a black hole, beautiful leaves flowing on the water, the water waving, leaves me nothing but thoughtfulness. the far away of the water, sky is kissing the surface of the water, the water waving, my heart too. I have never expect something unreal,and all I have, is my ownself, I am not like a strange person walking on a strange road. People differs.

When the cherry flowers bloomed, it’s early spring, I can always remember the days I am in Wuhan, a populated city in Central China, the Yangtze River flows through the city center, once upon a time, I was standing beside the river, I feel can see the world in a different way, suddenly, I feel I am alive, a unprecedentedly thrill. Someday,I am siting beside the working table, and I checked my email inbox, I saw nothing but advertisement mails, I knew exactly one thing, the gone, is gone. And I, have to go. Now and then.

Although, I missed you so much. Like the winter, suffering from the cold, I can through the winter, waiting the melting of the ice, when you came in, I can see you again, but I have never expect it, at least in the real world, you know, it’s just in my heart.